4 STEPS TO BREAK FREE FROM FEAR

Have you ever avoided applying for a job because it required you to do public speaking? And just thinking about speaking in front of a crowd scared the crap out of you. Have you ever had an idea at work but never spoke up because you were afraid it’d sound stupid? Have you ever stopped yourself from disagreeing with your boss because you were afraid he/she would fire you? I am pretty sure a few of you have your hands up, myself included. So why do we have fears? 

WHAT IS FEAR? 

Here is my definition of fear:  
An event in the past that we experienced or witnessed, created a negative impact.
Then we created a belief that the same outcome (or worse) will happen in a similar situation. 

Read the last sentence again.

That's right, we create our own beliefs and we live by them. Fear is not bad. It protects us from danger or getting hurt. But how do we know if our fear is really protecting us from danger or if it is just a belief we created for ourselves? Follow these 4 steps and see how you can break through your fear.

STEP 1
WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 
Ask yourself, what is the worst that could happen? And how likely will it actually happen? If you say the worst thing that could happen is “I tell my boss my idea and he thinks I’m an idiot. And now he thinks I’m less valuable.”. Then on a scale of 1 (not likely) -10 (it definitely will), how true do you believe the worst-case scenario would happen? Be very honest with your answer, this is the only way you can break through this cycle. 
STEP 2
THINK OF A SOLUTION
 
Ok, so now you have scaled your worst-case scenario, and the answer was probably not a 10 (definitely will happen). But there is still a possibility that it could come true. Absolutely!  And this is where many people stop. Knowing there is a possibility the worst-case scenario will play out, stop them dead in their tracks. This is the most important step. What solution can you come up with if it does happen?
MY EXAMPLE

I had a fear my marketing skills were not good enough. And my marketing efforts won’t generate any leads for my coaching business. A little background on me…I’ve been a marketer for over a decade. This fear prevented me from progressing in my coaching business. I realized this fear was sabotaging my dream and I wasn’t going to let my hard work as a coach fall to the wayside because of this fear.  I said to myself, let’s say my marketing efforts didn’t generate anything, I could always hire someone to do it. And if I don’t have enough money to hire someone, I could barter my coaching skills as payment. 
STEP 3
ACCEPT OR MOVE ON
 
Looking at the solution you’ve come up with, can you accept it? Are you able to live with the solution you put into place if the worst-case scenario does happen? If your answer is yes, CONGRATULATIONS! You have now broken the cycle and now able to move past your fear. If the answer is no, then whatever you’re trying to do is not for you at this moment. But it does not mean you've failed. It just means your fear is deeply rooted and will need further discussion. Keep doing this exercise no matter how similar the situation is.
STEP 4
REFLECT
 
Now put your plan into action. You know you can accept the worst-case scenario outcome. So do what you have always feared. When you have results from your plan, regardless if it was a success or failure, reflect on the process and learn from your experience. This will prevent future misbeliefs.
What did you noticed after you answered Step 3 "Accept or move on"? What did you feel?  Did you noticed your energy shifted? Did you feel lighter? How can you use that energy to move forward with your fear? 

If you have tried these 4 steps but are still paralyzed with your fear, set up a consultation with me to see how I can help you move past your deeply rooted fear(s).